I just discovered a beautiful blast from the past: the first CD I ever burned. Actually a friend made it for me, so I packed as many songs, pictures and miscellaneous things on it as possible so I could take advantage of every precious megabyte. I popped the CD in and had a terrific rush of nostalgia that got even more enriching once I opened up the “Freshman Farts” folder.

Yes, that’s right folks. While other college freshmen were out dancing on tables and puking in bathrooms, my new friends and I were having some good clean fun recording farts into my computer whenever the opportunity arose during conversation.

So I thought I’d give you all a little Christmas present early: 13 days worth of farts. There are some rules, though! Only listen to one per day! No fair cheating and going ahead!

The star of the recordings is Tom, my roommate, and you can also hear me laughing like a drugged hyena in the background. No, no, please…don’t say anything…you don’t have to thank me…you’re welcome ahead of time for this little gem. Tom, if you’re out there, I miss you dude - you were a great friend and roommate, and not just because you had a talented sphincter.

For those interested, these treats were recorded on a Packard Bell Pentium 1 with 32 megs of RAM and a $10 karaoke microphone from Radio Shack.